Awakened Read online

  “We’ll fix what Brianna did.” Rhys nuzzled Makenna’s neck. “I promise.”

  Makenna tamped down the fury in her gut. “I know you’ll try. But there may not be a way to reverse it. For now, Kylian has to be our focus.” If they didn’t defeat her father, it wouldn’t matter whether Amanda had her magic back or not. “Then we can take Brianna out.”

  With pleasure.

  Rhys’ brow lifted as he tried to maneuver past her shield. He sighed and let it go for the moment. “I fear you may be right, love.”

  He pulled her in for a hard kiss. She felt the surge of passion in him. They both needed more. But that would have to wait. Their pack came first, sometimes even before each other.

  That was one thing Makenna couldn’t reconcile with. Shouldn’t their union come first? They were stronger for their pack if they were stronger as a couple. Rhys didn’t share that opinion. A fact that bothered her more than she let on.

  Rhys pulled back his shoulders. “Let’s give the update.”

  Makenna nodded and followed him to the porch. She loved her pack. Sometimes though, she longed to have her mate to herself, and revel in what should’ve been newlywed bliss. She pushed down the longing. This was her life, and she had a duty. Her personal desires and needs would have to come second.

  FUBAR.

  Fucked up beyond all recognition. That pretty much summed up the situation.

  Rhys gazed at his weary pack. They were there to hear from their Alpha that Kylian’s defeat was imminent. Frustration coursed through him. While they’d won today, it was one of the few victories in the last nearly three months. Had it only been that long since Kylian had stolen his throne? Seemed like longer.

  Rhys longed to reach for Kenna’s hand as she stood by his side. But she was as weary and wounded as he. He wouldn’t amplify those feelings by adding his with a physical touch.

  That invisible crown weighed heavy on his head.

  He knew it weighed on Kenna too, and he wouldn’t increase her burden. He’d continue to shoulder more of the load until she grew fully into her power. She’d grown so much, learned so much in the past weeks. Yet she was still new to this world.

  Rhys wouldn’t let it destroy her.

  The god within growled low. Though he had always been a part of Rhys, he’d remained silent as he waited for his goddess to be ready for him to join his power with hers. He now thought Rhys was dismissing her strength. Rhys ignored him. He had enough to deal with.

  The crowd murmured, waiting on their Alpha to speak. He’d make this short and sweet, then meet with those closest to him to strategize.

  His voice boomed out. “Today, we were victorious.”

  The crowd cheered, their enthusiasm almost bringing a smile to his face.

  Rhys folded his arms across his chest. “But the war is far from over.” That shut them up. “Kylian is advancing. He grows stronger every moment. He’s summoning more of our people under his banner.” He rubbed his brow. “I know it’s difficult fighting friends, family. But it is necessary. Kylian doesn’t care what pain he inflicts. His brutality knows no limits.”

  He glanced at Makenna, giving into the urge to take her hand. Her fury swept through him, along with her happiness that he’d looked to her for comfort.

  Rhys glanced at the faces of his people. He needed to give them hope. Even if he was rapidly losing his. “But we fight for what is right. We fight for honor, for our people. To restore what once was. We are the Fianna! And we will be victorious, no matter the cost.”

  A cheer broke out, small, then growing until it rang through the trees. Rhys squeezed Makenna’s hand.

  She smiled at him, then turned to their people. “Go rest and take care of the injured. We’ll check on you shortly. And we will come up with a way to defeat the bastard. Soon.”

  He watched as the pack absorbed her words. Respect and love shone in their eyes. In a short time, she’d gained their trust and affection. She’d taken on her new world with gusto, doing her best with it. His chest swelled. Rhys couldn't have been more proud.

  The pack turned toward their homes. Then he, Kenna, Talon, and Bowen made their way inside. Trystan followed, leaning on Amanda. Rhys suspected he allowed her to assist him so she’d feel useful. Rhys had tried to show her she was still a vital member of the pack. Yet she’d withdrawn. He hoped Brianna’s curse would soon be lifted, and she’d be back to her old self.

  Makenna sidled up to him. “Hey, you all right? You seem a little...off.” She ran her soft hand up his arm.

  He watched her lick her lips. Between that, the fire of the fight still in his blood, and her touch, all he wanted to do was throw her over his shoulder, carry her to their bed, and bury himself inside her. How long had it been since they’d last made love? Days? A week? The fact he couldn’t remember hurt.

  Rhys swallowed hard. Then he deliberately cleared his lust from his mind. His people needed him. When things calmed down, he and Kenna could focus on each other. For now, they had a job to do.

  “Rhys?” Makenna’s brows dipped.

  He’d forgotten she’d asked a question. He forced a smile. “Just thinking.”

  She stiffened, eyes flashing, but only nodded and walked in to take her seat at the table, to the right of his own at the head. She avoided his gaze and slammed shields down around her mind, tighter than ever.

  He’d make it up to her. Soon.

  He again ignored the warning in his gut at the fury snapping in the air around her.

  “What do we have?” He stood above his chair, too amped up to sit.

  Trystan winced as he lowered himself to his seat, Amanda at his elbow. “Well, not much new, considering we didn’t take any prisoners today.”

  Rhys hadn’t had the stomach to capture and torture more of his own people. Maybe those who willingly followed Kylian were right. Maybe he wasn’t cut out to be king.

  He focused on Trystan. “Not every incursion results in prisoners.”

  Trystan merely nodded.

  Talon cleared his throat. “Our runners did find something. Kylian seems to have moved his base of operations. Though they haven’t discovered the exact location.”

  “Tell them to keep on it. I want to know where this bastard is.” Rhys turned to Bowen. “Any word yet on how he claimed our fucking throne?”

  “Not yet. I must be careful. Brianna is powerful. If she’s of the mind, when I use the glass, she can see the same things I do and maybe even pinpoint our location.” Bowen’s shoulders sagged. Lately, he looked years older than his two hundred. “My mages and I are doing all we can. Labeaux and his people have been a great help. Still, what Kylian has done is unheard of. To bring the rings from the ether without the presence of the rightful king and queen would require magic I cannot even fathom.”

  Rhys spun, his voice sharp and loud. “I’m aware. That’s why it’s to be your only focus. No more joining battles. Understand?”

  Bowen lifted his chin and bit back any retort. Talon and Trystan exchanged a look. Makenna sat up straight. Amanda’s eyes were wide as she looked anywhere but him. Rarely did he direct his anger at his own people. But lately, he’d changed. They all had. War did that.

  “Yes, Alpha.” Bowen tilted his head in deference.

  Rhys whirled on Talon. “What of our numbers? How many warriors do we have left?”

  Talon smiled when a curvy, tall redhead named Reagan placed a glass of tea in front of him. Reagan was a warrior as well, but chose to spend her time in the kitchen, caring for the pack. Talon followed her with his gaze as she moved on to the others.

  As far as Rhys was concerned, he should be focused on the meeting and not on the piece of ass he was after.

  Rhys made a noise and Talon straightened. Sadness filtered into his eyes as he shifted uncomfortably. “Ninety-eight. Even with those from other clans who have joined us. We’ve lost eleven more since we invaded the compound.”

  “Fuck!” Rhys grabbed a chair and slung it at the wall. Splinte
rs of wood flew. He leaned on the table, ignoring the worry from his mate. He avoided eye contact with her as he glared around the table. “So, does anyone have any fucking idea how to keep our wolves from dying?”

  Silence reigned. Makenna stood and rested her own hands on the table, inches from his.

  “We have to quit being sitting targets.” She straightened and crossed her arms. He finally met her eyes. They blazed, flashing from wolf to raven and back. Her voice gained strength. “I say we take the fight to Kylian. Hit his smaller camps. Send more scouts, find out which clans he plans to strike next, and bring them here before he gets his hands on them.”

  Makenna glared, daring him to challenge her.

  The need to do just that rose hard and fast in his blood. He growled. She growled. She wasn’t backing down. Makenna held his gaze, never wavering. In fact, a smile tickled those luscious lips.

  Gods, he loved that she had no fear of standing up to him. Of challenging him.

  Tension of a hotter variety swirled around them. He lifted his nose and inhaled. Her arousal shot into his system and fired his own. Suddenly, his leathers were way too tight.

  But that battle would have to wait.

  Talon coughed. “I think that’s a good idea.”

  “Aye.” Trystan chimed in. “It’s better than waiting for him to make a move. I say let’s turn it around on the son of a bitch. Make him wonder when we’re going to strike.”

  Amanda and Bowen nodded.

  Some of Rhys’ rage drained as he watched the people closest to him rise. Instead of cowering under his fury, they stood tall. Instead of getting angry and rebelling, they were letting him know they would be by his side until the end.

  He glanced at Makenna. She had that fire in her eyes. The one that turned him on and scared the shit out of him at the same time. The last time he’d seen it was when she came up with the idea to head into Kylian’s compound alone.

  Rhys sighed, his muscles losing a bit of their tension. It was a good plan. He would’ve thought of it if he hadn’t been so focused on just surviving the attacks.

  “All right then.” He shot a look at Talon. “Draw up the plans for a new offensive. Gather your best scouts and send them out at dawn.” He eyed the small group, thankful they were by his side. “We’ll regroup in the morning.”

  The crowd dispersed to their rooms, each of them in the main house with him and Makenna. As he followed his mate up the main stairs and toward the hall that led to their private staircase, he turned to see Amanda helping Talon into his room. His Beta gave him a nod, then forgot all about Rhys as he smiled down at the female who held him.

  Who knew? Maybe Trystan would finally summon the courage to claim her tonight. Rhys doubted it though. A shadow rode his Beta, one Trystan had never explained to Rhys. That darkness, whatever it was, had to be at the center of Trystan’s reasons for not claiming his mate.

  Speaking of mates.

  He turned to watch his head up to their suite. The sway of her hips and that perfect ass called to him. He wished he could let himself go and ravage her like he wanted to. Rhys readjusted himself in his pants and worked his neck from side to side.

  That wasn't going to happen tonight. They were both beyond exhausted and needed all the rest they could get to start the fight all over again in the morning. Though lately, sleep had been elusive for him. Most nights he’d stayed up thinking, mourning his lost wolves and trying to figure out how Kylian had taken so much from them, and how to get it back.

  The excuse of being too tired sounded pitiful even to his own mind, though.

  He’d wait for Kenna to get done with her shower, take his own, then slide into bed and hope she didn’t try to force his hand. Because no way would he be able to resist her. A part of him said he shouldn’t. That he should walk right into that shower with her and take his comfort, giving to her in return. That they should do everything they could to keep their mating strong.

  But he couldn’t give in to those urges.

  His wolf howled his displeasure. The raven within him squawked his frustration.

  The god growled without making a move, not yet fully awakened. And not just because the goddess hadn’t fully manifested in Makenna. His true power couldn't be unleashed until their mating was complete. Though they were bonded, certain things had to happen for the bond to cement entirely, becoming even stronger, unbreakable.

  Things like completely accepting all of themselves and each other, and trusting one another without reservation.

  Which wouldn’t happen if this distance between them continued to grow.

  As Rhys sat in the chair by their bed, he tried to force away thoughts of the real reason he held back. There was too much pain there. The other side of him, the king, the Alpha, knew his people had to come first. If they didn’t, their being strong as a pair wouldn’t make any difference.

  It hadn’t for his parents. They’d been so in love and happy. They’d always put each other first. It had led to their deaths.

  Sometimes being king royally sucked.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Stay

  Amanda didn’t say a word while the others were throwing around ideas for taking Kylian down. What could she say?

  She was nothing. Not wolf. Not human.

  Sliding one hand under the table, she tried for the millionth time to conjure the familiar light red flame. Her heart leapt when a tiny crimson spark erupted in her palm. Hope died a harsh death as it sputtered, then flickered out.

  She clenched her hand into a fist. Damn that bitch Brianna. Sister or not, if Amanda ever got hold of her again, she’d kill her. After she got Brianna to reverse whatever curse she’d hit her with.

  Amanda almost snorted. Not that she could do any of that. She barely had the strength to make dinner for the pack. Reagan had to help her. Amanda didn’t mind the company; she liked Reagan. And she really hoped that her brother Talon and Reagan would get together. The charge between them was so electric, they had to be mates.

  She glanced across the table at Talon. Sure enough, he was watching Reagan like a hawk as the red-headed beauty brought them tea and those amazing white chocolate macadamia cookies she made.

  Amanda swung her gaze to her sister. Makenna was staring down her mate, daring him to disagree with her idea. Amanda nearly smiled. Then the pain in her heart dragged the joy away.

  Pulling away from her siblings and the rest of the pack probably wasn’t the best thing, but she was no longer like them. Makenna and Talon had told her a million times her power didn’t matter, that she was still their sister and part of the pack.

  But she no longer felt like it. There was no connection. The place in her mind and heart where she’d once felt the pack link was filled with a static buzz now.

  The entire pack had reached out to her. Tried harder to involve her in everything. Talon, Makenna, Rhys, and Trystan had made sure to include her in training sessions, telling her that magic or not, she could still fight.

  But she didn’t want their pity. Couldn’t stand the sympathetic glances, and even more hugs and innocuous touches than normal. Though her wolf would have lavished in the attention, Amanda couldn’t feel her. Physical touch didn’t do the same thing for her now that her wolf was gone. It didn’t soothe or calm her. Instead it agitated her.

  Even Trystan’s touch.

  She watched the male sitting beside her. Her mate. Though, he refused to acknowledge that fact. For what reasons she could only guess. They’d never discussed it. No matter that they were best friends. No matter how many times he came to her, and she gave herself to him. No matter that he’d stayed by her side almost constantly since the battle that took her soul. She never said a word about it. She wanted him to admit it on his own.

  She couldn’t bear the thought he might know and not want to claim her.

  But it was all a moot point now. She couldn’t allow him to tie himself to her in her present state. Their people were warriors. Their Beta couldn’t be mated to someon
e who couldn’t fight at his side and protect the pack. Who couldn’t be the Beta female the pack deserved.

  Her heart twisted into knots. There was only one thing to do. Cut off their odd relationship and never pick it up again.

  Trystan’s voice shook her from her depressing thoughts. “Manda, you coming?” He stood behind her chair, hands on her shoulders, his warm breath tickling her ear.

  Amanda nodded and scooted out of her chair. She gave him an anemic smile as she slid her arm around his waist. He probably didn’t really need her help, not that she could give much to begin with. She just couldn’t stop herself from touching him.

  After all, it would be one of the last times she did.

  Tonight, she’d tell him they couldn’t go on like this. They had to end it.

  No more sneaking into each other’s rooms. No more running to each other for comfort. No more of the mad, passionate love they used to make. The kind they hadn’t made since the “incident” because he was afraid of hurting her.

  She wouldn’t be a pity fuck if he eventually decided to try again. It had to be over. Not just because of her issues, but because he hadn’t been the same since Ciarra had died.

  Maybe Trystan had loved Ciarra; maybe he hadn’t. That wasn’t something he’d shared with her. To his credit, he hadn’t come to Amanda while he was with Ciarra. Only after she’d died. He and Amanda’s relationship had been strained while he slept with Ciarra. But as soon as she was gone, he’d come running back to Amanda, and she’d taken him in. Yet again being his fall back girl.

  Her resolve strengthened. She wouldn’t be anyone’s backup anymore. Not that it mattered.

  “Hey, what’s up with you?” He leaned into her as they climbed the stairs. He was only doing it to make her feel useful. That galled.

  “Nothing.” She brushed his question aside as they reached the landing and turned left to his room.

  “Liar.” He raised an eyebrow as he slung the door open and stopped before entering. He nodded at Rhys as he passed. “You know you can tell me anything.”