Awakened Page 10

  “If I’d just told her the truth, none of this would be...” He shook his head.

  This wasn’t all his fault. She could’ve asked him why he hadn’t claimed her. If she’d asked, he would’ve told her. Despite that everything in him balked at it. She held back as much, if not more, than he did.

  Makenna kept talking, but he didn’t hear her.

  Trystan clenched his fists and continued to pace. His wolf was just as livid, offended their mate would repudiate them. He howled and scratched to be given freedom to chase her down. Trystan ignored him. He’d walked out of that infirmary determined to make this right, and she’d done the exact thing she knew would hurt him most.

  Amanda wanted it to be over? She wanted to give up on what fate had given them? He would too. Even if he tried to claim her, it wouldn’t matter. She wouldn’t let him. And their bond would never fully form with all the shit between them.

  He turned on Makenna, feeling his eyes flash wolf. “I gotta run.”

  Trystan darted into the woods before she could say another word. He shifted quickly and ran until his sides heaved, dashing through the water and mud, jumping logs and scaring wildlife. As even gators scattered, his blazing fury only increased. Finally, he circled back toward the camp, but stayed in the woods. He shifted back into his human form and plopped down on a fallen log. When a familiar female picked her way through the underbrush toward him a few minutes later, he growled. She smiled.

  Oh for fuck’s sake.

  Another irritated rumble vibrated his chest before he could stop it. He should’ve known better. He remembered she loved it when he was rough and angry.

  Trystan sighed, anger surging through him. “Deirdre, what the hell do you want?”

  The lithe, red-headed beauty sidled up to him. He hadn’t spoken to her since she’d arrived with her pack. Had no desire to. But as her citrus scent tickled his nose and her ample breasts hovered in front of his face, nearly falling out of the tight tank top she wore, he reconsidered. His eyes roamed her rounded hips and long legs, encased in tight jeans.

  Maybe another female was just what he needed to get Amanda out of his system.

  Deirdre ran a hand through his hair. Her familiarity irked his wolf. The animal swished his tail and let out a low rumble in Trystan’s head.

  “I saw you were upset. I thought I’d see if there was anything I could do.”

  He glanced up at first her chest, then her eyes. She’d been there several times before when he was trying to forget Amanda. Yes, she’d do nicely. His wolf disagreed but divorced himself of the situation by retreating to a corner.

  Putting the female who would never be his out of his mind, he tugged Deirdre to him by her hips. “I could think of a few things.” He stood, letting his body slide along hers, then grabbed a fistful of hair and yanked her head back. Her eyes flared with lust. “You sure about this? I’m not in the best of moods.”

  “Oh, absolutely. I’ve missed you.” She ran her hands over his chest and gripped his shirt, pulling him closer.

  Trystan took her mouth. He backed her up until her spine hit a tree. Grinding himself against her hips as he savagely kissed her, his hands kneaded her thighs. Finally he broke the kiss, licking along her throat and down her chest.

  This is wrong. You don’t even want her. The words echoed in his head and he shoved them away.

  Deidre moaned his name. Instead of turning him on, it sent ice through his veins. The only voice he wanted saying his name in a fit of passion was Amanda’s. She may have denied what they were, but she was still his. Always would be. They’d always be connected.

  Trystan set Deirdre away. There’d be no easing his hunger with a surrogate. No more blaming Amanda for what was his fault. This whole mess was on him, and he needed to be man enough to admit that. To face how he’d hurt her, and do everything in his power to make it right.

  He’d fight for Amanda. For them. Even if she couldn’t.

  He backed away. “I’m sorry.”

  Deidre straightened her shirt and stood tall. Frustration and disappointment lingered for the smallest of seconds before she banished them. “It’s okay. It was never me you wanted.” She gave a sad smile, then nodded toward camp. “Go find her.”

  “I will. But not yet. I’m gonna go for another run.”

  As Deirdre headed back to camp, Trystan shifted and took off. His wolf practically sighed. He’d been offended at the touch of someone other than their mate, as he’d always been. His relief coursed through Trystan.

  Still, the anger remained. Though determined to win Amanda, he couldn’t face her just yet. He wanted to be calm when he spoke with her. Explain things rationally. Right now, the adrenaline pumping in his veins wouldn’t allow that.

  Nor would the beast coming alive inside him.

  He ran for miles, past the perimeter, out of the swamp and across sugar cane fields. When he came to the edge of the river, he shifted back. He recognized the territory. He’d run a little over twenty miles. Suddenly, he was exhausted. It took all he had to stay on his feet as his wounds caught up with him. Resting his hands on his knees, Trystan tried to catch his breath.

  It was at that moment two unfamiliar scents swam past him on the breeze. He straightened and immediately went on alert. As did his wolf. There was a hint of something in their scents he recognized.

  Brianna’s magic.

  “Fuck!” he whispered, turning around slowly.

  “Look at this. I’d say we’re getting close.” A well-built wolf nodded at his equally large friend. “We’ve found their Beta. And all alone too."

  The two stalked him.

  Scouts. Too close to camp for his liking. Though his body was nearing complete exhaustion, he pulled on his magic to repair himself. To prepare for a fight. Because he really needed this fight. It would be the perfect outlet for the fury in his gut.

  He smirked. “Not nearly as close as you think.” Throwing his dominance into the air to dampen their power, he didn’t give them the chance to strike first.

  He leaped for the first scout, shifting. Landing on his chest, Trystan’s wolf ripped out the male’s throat. The other rammed into him, shoving him off his fellow soldier. Trystan shifted back as he leapt to his feet, spitting out the scout’s blood. He bared his teeth in a smile.

  This one could provide them with information. Trystan would see that he gave it up.

  With a guttural roar, he barreled into his opponent.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  Fuel

  Today fucking sucked.

  First, there was Rhys rejecting Makenna this morning. Then the horrific battle. Almost losing Trystan. The seesaw of emotion as she fought to save him, and then him coming back. As if that wasn’t enough, Rhys had finally showed her some attention, made amazing love to her, and then ruined it when he’d decided to be a jackass. The run in her wolf form hadn’t helped. So she’d shifted to her raven and soared among the low clouds. That didn’t work either.

  Now Makenna watched Trystan run away, in more ways than one. She wished there was something she could do. But how could she help him when she couldn’t even help herself?

  Rhys was slipping away from her. It was like living with a ghost. Sometimes she could feel his love for her, their connection. Others, it seemed like she clung to wispy echoes of memories of the short weeks she’d felt whole. Happy. But like every other piece of happiness in her life, fate was ripping it away from her.

  When they’d first mated, Rhys promised nothing could come between them.

  He’d lied.

  Makenna scanned the field, watching their warriors train, and the kids learning their magic. But she didn’t really see any of it, too consumed with things she didn’t understand and didn’t want to believe. She walked the common area, nodding to her pack mates or saying hello. But she wasn’t present. Their concerned looks said they picked up on it.

  When she’d seen Amanda and Rhys talking earlier, jealousy charged her. When was the last time Rhys
had talked to her like that? Focused on her so completely for something other than getting into her pants? Even then, something was missing. The passion and fire were still there, but they’d waned. Not just the usual “honeymoon’s over” stuff. It was deeper. More sinister.

  Her fear was that it would only get worse.

  But she’d deal with it. Just like she’d dealt with everything else in her life. All by her fucking self. All she could do was keep trying. If he didn’t respond, she’d go on with her life, do her job, be the best damn queen she could be. And hope that’d be enough to fill the gaping hole her mate was supposed to occupy.

  Her wolf whined. Her raven flapped her wings, craning her neck and releasing sharp tocks, not nearly as quiet about it. She pecked at Makenna, wanting to scratch Rhys’ eyes out.

  She was a feisty little bitch of a bird.

  Spotting Rhys, she trotted over. May as well try to make nice with him after walking out on him. It’d be a start. Hopefully, he’d accept her apology and reciprocate her effort.

  Makenna invaded Rhys’ personal space. As was her right. Her wolf backed her up and pushed against her skin, wanting contact with her mate. The raven just cocked her head and scratched with her talons.

  “How are they doing?”

  Rhys and Makenna had no idea how much experience the new wolves had, or what kind of training they’d received. They’d escaped Kylian’s forces, but that could’ve been pure luck. She and Rhys hadn’t had a chance to see them in action.

  Besides, it was a safe subject to get the conversation going.

  Rhys glanced at her and smiled. She could almost believe he was happy to see her, despite the residual anger over her quick exit earlier. His eyes went back to the field as the warrior closest to them shifted midair and barreled into his sparring partner.

  “They’re damn good. Their Alpha trained them well.”

  “Good.” She shuffled her feet. “Look, I’m sorry I walked out. I just needed to think.”

  Rhys’ smile faded. He didn’t look at her. “You walked away in the middle of our conversation. I didn’t like it.”

  Makenna bit back a sigh. “A conversation that was going nowhere. We were both pissed, so we’d have just ended up saying shit we didn’t mean and hurting each other even more.”

  His chest rumbled. “What hurt was you doubting my desire for you.” He swallowed hard. “If you’d taken the time to listen to me, we could’ve worked it out.” He looked like he wanted to say more but clenched his teeth.

  This was not going the way she’d envisioned it. Forcing herself to not snap back at him, Makenna breathed deep. “I said I was sorry.” She reached for him, then thought better of it at the dark look on his face. “You weren’t listening to me either. You shut me out. That hurt.”

  Guilt flickered in his eyes, then resolve. That didn’t bode well for her or them.

  “I know this war is crazy. It was probably the worst time ever for us to find each other. But we’re here now. I just need you to trust me enough to let me in.” Her gaze sharpened on his. “I’ve trusted you with my life. Left my entire world and stepped into yours, for you. Because I love you. Don’t make me regret that.”

  Rhys’ breath stuttered on the exhale. He cupped her jaw. Makenna leaned into the touch, desperate for the feel of her mate despite her anger.

  “I’m trying here, Kenna. This mating thing is new to me too.” He moved his hands to her hips. “Kylian’s taken enough from us. I can’t let him take you from me too. I’m doing what I think is best.” She opened her mouth and he shook his head. “I know you don’t need protecting, but I won’t allow this war to destroy your beautiful heart.”

  Makenna closed her eyes. Calm. She’d stay calm. “I get that. But you’ve got to understand I’m just as strong as you are. This is my fight too. You can’t protect me from that.”

  Whatever he would’ve said next was cut off as a wolf bumped into them from behind, sending them sprawling. She landed on top of him with a grunt, barely keeping her forehead from slamming into his.

  They lay there, staring into each other’s eyes. Fire leapt through her, the feel of his hard body underneath her sending her into overdrive. Like it always did.

  “I’m so sorry, Alpha!” The young wolf looked down with a flushed, fearful face.

  Rhys didn’t move, didn’t take his eyes from Makenna’s. “That’s all right, son. Go back to your training.”

  The young male took off like he’d been shot out of a gun. Makenna barely noticed. Her wolf pushed against her skin to get as close to Rhys as possible, while her raven let out a quiet tock tock, still pissed even as she moved closer too.

  Rhys wrapped a hand around her nape and pulled her forehead to his. Closing their eyes, they luxuriated in the comfort and peace the contact provided, even as desire pounded at them.

  After basking for a moment, Makenna placed her hands on either side of his head and pushed herself up. “What do you say we take this elsewhere? Maybe go for a run, let our wolves have some time together. Or let our ravens out and catch some air. Spend the evening in the woods. Just us.”

  Hope flared in her heart as his eyes sparked. Oh, he liked that idea. Spending the rest of this crazy day together, finding some peace and quiet, could help them get back on track.

  Rhys tugged her in for a slow, sensual kiss. Neither of them cared who was watching. Wolves were affectionate, tactile beings, not afraid to show that affection or need for touch. If she was to look around, she doubted anyone was paying them any attention. Not that it mattered. Her world revolved around Rhys at the moment.

  She responded with enthusiasm, tangling her tongue with his. She almost felt like purring as his hands ran up and down her back and over her hips. This was part of what she’d missed. Sure, she’d just had him a few hours ago. But this was different. They were connecting on a level they hadn’t even then.

  Rhys pulled back with a groan. “Perhaps we should find somewhere more private.” He clutched her ass, squeezing hard. “The things I want to do to you aren’t for anyone else’s eyes.”

  He pressed her into him. Feeling the hard evidence of his desire, Makenna melted. “Yes, please.”

  Rhys sat her on her feet as he stood himself. Then he took her hand. His face suddenly became serious. “But after, we need to talk.”

  “Absolutely.” The word came out breathy.

  Her heart soared. They had a chance. This was all just a bump in the road they’d navigate past. She gave him her best smile. The one reserved only for him.

  “Let me just tell Talon we’ll be─”

  “Rhys!”

  “Alpha!”

  Makenna didn’t hold back her growl at the interruptions from Talon and Brenton. She turned with Rhys to face the intruders.

  “I have a couple young warriors who could use your help.” Brenton scanned Rhys and Makenna. His nostrils flared, and his eyes widened. He stepped back. “It can wait.” He was gone as quickly as he’d arrived.

  Talon raised a brow at what she knew was a murderous look on her face. “Sorry, sis, but I really do need to steal him. And you, for that matter.” He glanced at Rhys. “We’re working with Bowen to come up with counters for the little surprises Brianna’s put in their magic, but some of the new wolves especially are having some issues.” He gave them a sympathetic smile. “I hate to ask, Makenna, but maybe you could give them some pointers on assimilating the new spells? And Rhys, your control is legendary.” Talon gave an apologetic look.

  Rhys held up a hand. “It’s all right, Talon.” He turned to Makenna. “We’ll finish this later.” She couldn’t help her eyes narrowed. Or stop the snarl. “I promise, love. After dinner, I’m all yours.”

  Makenna nodded, knowing her voice would give away her doubt. He’d promised that before. Then she ended up either alone in bed while he poured over battle plans, or lying next to someone who’d just turned her down, giving one of many lame ass excuses.

  Rhys’ eyes narrowed, but he didn�
�t say anything.

  Makenna put on what she called her “queen” face, all business, as she addressed Talon. “Lead the way.”

  She followed Rhys and Talon to where Bowen was speaking intently to a group of wolves. Throwing magic and training warriors were the farthest things from her mind. Instead, her anger and frustration fermented inside her, growing to epic levels.

  This war wasn’t just taking their people or their throne. It was taking everything. Every one of Kylian and Brianna’s schemes were converging to not only destroy their world, but see to it Makenna and Rhys’ bond would never be complete.

  The war was driving a wedge between them.

  Rhys had explained how it took time for a bond to mature. Eventually, they’d be able to read each other’s minds without casting their thoughts. Their minds, their hearts, would be so entwined that, other than for their physical bodies, they would very nearly literally be one.

  To be bound to another like that scared her, but mostly it fascinated her. She craved it. To know for certain the person she loved most would be with her in every way? That she’d never be alone again? It was what she wanted most. But each day, that dream slipped further away.

  Makenna stood silent as Bowen explained the spell he’d created and how once they absorbed it into their own magic, it would remain embedded until he lifted it. Or died. She shivered. The thought of losing the mage shook her. Since she’d come into this world, he’d taught her so much, been so patient. He was quickly becoming like a father to her.

  That straightened her shoulders. She wouldn’t let Kylian and Brianna take anything else from her. She’d kill them both first.

  As soon as she could figure out where the fuck they were.

  Bowen touched her shoulder. “Makenna, will you demonstrate?”

  He extended his hands toward her. Dark orange light formed in front of his palms as he closed his eyes and chanted. The light formed into perfect spheres, floating in the air.